Why has my dog become reactive? help!

It is very common for dogs to become reactive. By that I mean that as young pups they have displayed very little signs of reactivity but as they have got older their reactivity increases and it can seem very arbitrary as to what triggers their reactivity and why this happens. 

This can be explained using the "cup of tea theory". Ok I made the name up, but it's a great analogy.

This is what happens when you hold a cup of tea in your hand in order to drink it. The cup is half full and if you only hold it for a few seconds there is no problem it does not feel heavy and we can drink our tea happily. However, if I ask you to hold the same half cup of tea in your hand for 6 hours, although nothing has changed, it's still the same half cup of tea, it feels really really heavy and uncomfortable. 

This is the same for our dogs and their tolerance for surprises and things that might make them feel uncomfortable. As puppies they may be ok with sheep, new visitors, the doorbell etc.  As they get older and normal life's stresses and strains begin to take their toll they are living life a bit on the edge ( kinda like peri menopausal women, by now their tolerance for what used to be ok is incredibly low! if you are peri menopausal or you know someone who is, you will understand this. Otherwise just trust me on this one....)  

I totally understand how confusing it must be as a dog owner when it looks like one minute your dog is ok with the bin man, other dogs, men in caps and now it feels like they are reactive to everything and anything when you go for your usual walk. 

I have good news for you, it's nothing you did wrong. It happens often and there is lots you can do to help your dog become more relaxed and calm and therefore much more tolerant and less reactive to these things. 

What not to do: 

• Don't do anything when your dog is actually being reactive. Why? because they are in panic mode and not listening anyway.
• Don't keep going back to "the thing" in the hope that suddenly they will be ok with it. 
• Don't say No and/or shout at them when they are being reactive. Why? because they are not listening anyway and honestly it's just mean. Your dog is only trying to warn you/protect you from "the thing" 

Now that you understand the solution is not getting rid of "the thing" that your dog is reacting to, let's try something new.  I am sure you already know it's exhausting avoiding/distracting your dog from every other dog, squirrel, man in high viz jacket even a randomly placed bin, whatever is "the thing" for your dog. 

The solution:

Step 1

STOP what you are doing. If it feels hard or like it's just not working something has to change.  Seek help and try something different.

( If you continue doing what's not working then you are likely innocently training your dog to be reactive to "the thing"! You dog will think it's doing a great job of protecting/warning you of all these "things" out there. )

The solution is changing your dog's mind about having to react to the thing in the first place. Well ok Julie I hear you say, that sounds easy just tell me and I will do it! I wish it were that simple, this has become my life's work and I will do all I can to help you. 

Step 2

Understand that the problem is inside your dog. It's the way they are feeling that causes a reaction. Not "the thing". Read that again....It's really good news.  Now you no longer have to worry about all "the things" you get to just focus on your dog and helping them feel more relaxed and calm all the time. 

The more relaxed and calm your dog is generally, the less reactive they are likely to be. 

Step 3 

Look for the obvious in your own situation.  I bet you already know when your dog is feeling stressed and worried, you maybe even can tell when they are about to react. Trust in yourself, don't listen to anyone else. Their dog is not your dog. 

• Take them away from "the thing" as calmly and quietly as possible.
• Reduce the amount of time exposed to "the thing" . Once they are feeling calmer and more relaxed, you can build the exposure up slowly slowly slowly at their pace
• Consider all the things you could do at home to make them feel more relaxed generally. 

Please know that your dog will likely always react to some things, they would be a robot otherwise! However, you do not have to live with excessive reactivity. If you decide to make some of the above changes, I would love to know how you get on. Drop me an e-mail.  If you are ready to go professional and really commit to making the changes and helping your dog live their best most relaxed life. Come and join me in Peaceful Paws Course & Community a friendly relaxed place on the t'internet for dog owners of anxious or reactive dogs. 

Peaceful paws always. 

Julie x